The Vision Quest Chronicles: Tales of Living One's Vision

When I was a little girl, I received a number of messages about what it meant to be a good girl and, eventually, a good woman.

My mother was particularly concerned with teaching me how to be ladylike. Being ladylike meant keeping my voice down, not being too boisterous, and having good manners. Later, I was told no man wanted a woman who was “out there in front,” a warning not to draw too much attention to myself. The message was clear: A woman should know her place, and that place was generally somewhere in the background assisting someone else.

My father had a different message. Whenever we parted, we would kiss goodbye, and he would often tell me, “Be sweet.”

I understood it as his way of sending me out into the world with a reminder to be a good person or maybe to stay as sweet as he saw me. But I also remember questioning it. Something about “Be sweet” felt vaguely constraining, although I couldn’t quite put my finger on why. I know he said it to my sister and me, but I wasn’t sure whether he said it to my brother, so I asked him. When Daddy said goodbye to him as a boy, did he say, “Be sweet,” or something else? “I think, be sweet,” my brother replied. When I asked what it meant to him, he said, “Be good? Do the right thing.”

Maybe that’s all my father meant. If he said the same words to his son, perhaps “be sweet” was simply his way of saying “be good.” But words don’t land in a vacuum. My brother heard a call to do the right thing. I heard it alongside every other message I was absorbing about how a girl should be, and in that chorus, “sweet” meant something narrower. Why “be sweet”? Why not “be courageous,” “be kind,” or simply “be good”? Being good can encompass many qualities, including integrity, compassion, and courage. Sweetness carries a particular connotation, one closely tied to traditional expectations of femininity. And that raises the question of what we’re really teaching little girls when we encourage them to be sweet, to be good girls, to be nice.

I want to be clear that my parents never taught me that being sweet or ladylike meant remaining silent when something was wrong or when I felt unsafe. Quite the opposite. We were taught to be alert to danger, to protect ourselves, and not to be afraid to remove ourselves from uncomfortable or potentially dangerous situations. Nevertheless, I find these messages interesting because they reflect broader societal expectations about how girls and women are supposed to behave.

Of course, these messages weren’t unique to my family. On a societal level, many girls are conditioned from an early age to believe that being agreeable, accommodating, compliant, and pleasant are desirable feminine qualities. Assertiveness, competitiveness, and even aggression, on the other hand, are traditionally associated with masculinity.

And because women have historically been taught that being attractive and likable is important to their success, particularly in relation to men, they may learn to suppress qualities that could make them appear intimidating or difficult.

This isn’t just confined to romantic relationships. It can affect how girls relate to teachers, authority figures, and eventually employers. In some environments, girls even learn that displaying their intelligence can make them less attractive to boys. Speaking up in class, knowing the answers, or outperforming male classmates may come with social consequences.

I was fortunate to spend my formative educational years in single-sex schools, where we were encouraged to be intelligent, academically successful, and intellectually curious. We didn’t have to worry about whether demonstrating our abilities would make us less appealing to boys. Not every girl has that experience.

For some, the lessons begin early: Don’t be too smart. Don’t be too loud. Don’t be too ambitious. Don’t make other people uncomfortable.

And those nice little girls often grow up to become nice women. Niceness has a price. It shows up in our paychecks, in our safety, and in how much of our lives we feel entitled to claim as our own.

The Professional Price of Niceness

The conditioning doesn’t disappear when women enter the workplace. In fact, it can have significant professional and financial consequences.

Research on gender and professional advancement has examined differences in self-promotion and willingness to pursue opportunities. Some studies suggest that women face greater social penalties for self-promotion (Rudman, 1998; Moss-Racusin & Rudman, 2010), while men may feel freer to put themselves forward (Exley & Kessler, 2022). These are tendencies, not rules, but they raise an important question: how much talent goes unrecognized when women are discouraged from making their accomplishments visible?

And in the professional world, advocating for yourself is essential. If you want a promotion, you often have to make your accomplishments visible. If you believe you deserve a raise, you need to be willing to ask for it. And if you’re running a business, you must be able to articulate the value of your services and stand behind your fees.

As a consultant, I know how important this is. Organizations sometimes engage in what we call scope creep. You’ve negotiated a contract, established the deliverables, and agreed upon compensation. Then the client begins requesting additional work beyond the original agreement.

Sometimes, as a business owner, you may decide to accommodate a reasonable request. But you must also be willing to say, “No, that falls outside the scope of our agreement,” or negotiate additional compensation. If you’re more concerned with being nice than protecting the value of your work, you can easily find yourself doing more than you agreed to for the same amount of money. And that’s not good business.

There is also a double standard in how assertiveness is perceived. In his work on organizational leadership, Patrick Lencioni emphasizes the value of productive conflict: teams need to debate ideas openly, sometimes passionately, to arrive at better decisions (Lencioni, 2002).

Yet women who engage in that same passionate debate may be perceived as aggressive, hostile, or difficult. We’re expected to advocate for our positions, but apparently we’re supposed to do it with a smile on our faces.

Showing frustration, irritation, or anger can carry professional consequences that men engaging in similar behavior may not experience. For African American women, this double standard can be particularly damaging because of the persistent stereotype of the “angry Black woman.” An African American woman expressing herself assertively or passionately may find her behavior interpreted through both gendered and racial stereotypes.

The result is that women may learn to moderate not only what they say but how they say it, continually managing other people’s perceptions rather than simply expressing themselves. And that takes energy.

When Being Nice Becomes Dangerous

Perhaps one of the most troubling consequences of conditioning girls and women to be agreeable and avoid confrontation is the potential impact on their physical and emotional safety.

Consider the early stages of sexual harassment. A coworker begins making inappropriate jokes. An acquaintance becomes overly familiar. Someone repeatedly touches a woman’s shoulder or back in ways that make her uncomfortable.

She may recognize that something doesn’t feel right, but hesitate to speak up. She doesn’t want to make a scene. She doesn’t want to embarrass anyone. She doesn’t want to be accused of overreacting or misinterpreting someone’s intentions.

And that hesitation can create opportunities for someone who is deliberately testing boundaries. A person who gets away with one inappropriate touch may attempt another. Someone whose sexual comments go unchallenged may become increasingly explicit.

This does not mean assertiveness can prevent every assault, nor does silence make a woman responsible for someone else’s misconduct. But when a person is testing boundaries, speaking up early may interrupt an escalating pattern.

Women need to know that they have the right to say, “Don’t touch me.” They have the right to tell someone to back up, stop making inappropriate comments, or leave them alone. And sometimes that means making a scene.

Whether on public transportation, in a crowded nightclub, or in the workplace, women should not feel obligated to prioritize another person’s comfort over their own physical boundaries. Of course, the safest response depends on the circumstances. Sometimes confrontation is appropriate; other times leaving or seeking assistance is the better choice.

The point is that being polite should never take precedence over protecting yourself.

When Women Refuse to Be Silent

We need only look at the recent sexual assault allegations involving members of a Cornell University fraternity and the public reaction to the woman who brought those allegations to see how deeply these expectations remain embedded in our culture.

Rather than focusing exclusively on the allegations and the available evidence, some public commentary has turned toward questioning the woman’s credibility, appearance, and motives. Megyn Kelly’s reported remarks about the woman’s attractiveness are particularly troubling. “I’m just going to be honest, she’s not the most attractive gal,” said the media personality. “She’s extremely beefy in her arms and her legs.” Kelly went on to suggest that the young woman should be grateful for the attention (Media Matters, October 5, 2026).

What does a woman’s physical attractiveness have to do with whether she was sexually assaulted? Very little. For decades, researchers have recognized that sexual violence is not driven by attraction (Lisak & Roth, 1988). It is driven far more by hostility toward women, entitlement, and a desire for power and control (Malamuth et al., 2021).

And then there’s all this concern about ruining these young men’s reputations and futures. But why is that responsibility being placed on the woman who came forward? If these men engaged in the conduct they’re accused of, their own actions jeopardized their futures, not her decision to report them.

Anyone accused of a crime deserves due process. Allegations must be investigated, and guilt should not be presumed. But due process does not require vilifying the person who makes a report.

To me, this reflects the same message women have been receiving since childhood: Don’t make trouble. Don’t embarrass anyone. Don’t make people uncomfortable. Be nice. Even when you’ve been harmed.

The Heroine’s Quest

Remember that place in the background, assisting someone else? For many women, that’s where the good-girl conditioning finally settles: in the expectation that caretaking is our primary job and our time belongs to whoever needs it. Many of us have been taught that putting ourselves first is selfish, even when we are pursuing ambitions of our own.

I know this struggle intimately. For years, I’ve tried to negotiate between the life I want to live and the expectations placed upon me. In the language of the Heroine’s Quest, I’ve tried to keep one foot on the path of adventure while keeping the other in the Ordinary World. I explored this struggle more personally in my essay, “When Fulfilling Your Mission Means Breaking the Rules.”

But time and energy are finite. I have work I want to accomplish, books I want to write, things I want to create, and a mission I want to fulfill. Every hour I spend meeting someone else’s expectations is an hour I cannot devote to those pursuits.

There is a real opportunity cost to compulsory caretaking. When a woman’s time is treated as a free commodity, the resources she needs to support herself, develop her talents, and pursue her ambitions are diminished.

And if her time isn’t already allocated to a husband, children, or some other recognized responsibility, it may be treated as available. Apparently, if you’re not taking care of someone else, you must have time to spare. But why is that someone never you?

I’ve come to recognize that I cannot spend the rest of my life negotiating with a system that expects me to subordinate my mission to other people’s demands. Systems that benefit from compliance generally have little incentive to surrender those benefits voluntarily.

At some point, the heroine has to stop fighting for permission to leave the Ordinary World and answer the Call to Adventure. That doesn’t mean abandoning everyone she loves. Helping others is also part of the journey.

Companions on the Journey

One of the essential stages of the Heroine’s Quest is the Return with the Elixir: bringing back something of value to share with others. But the heroine must have the opportunity to undertake the quest before she can return with anything at all.

Dorothy, in The Wiz and The Wizard of Oz, meets the Scarecrow, the Tin Man, and the Lion along her journey. Each is seeking something, and she chooses to help them. But she doesn’t abandon her own mission. She invites them to accompany her to see the Wizard.

And they help her, too. They support and protect her as they overcome obstacles together. Their relationship is reciprocal: each pursues something important while helping the others along the way.

None of them insists that Dorothy abandon her quest to attend to his needs. They accept the help she freely offers while supporting her mission. That help is her choice, not an obligation imposed on her.

That’s very different from a heroine continually summoned back to the Ordinary World to meet someone else’s expectations. How can you move toward your destination when you’re constantly required to turn around?

Batman answers the Bat-Signal because protecting Gotham City is the mission he has chosen. Batman answers the Bat-Signal, not a call from his mom.

Now, admittedly, these heroic tales often conveniently eliminate the parents, thereby relieving the hero of certain familial obligations. But the point remains: the hero or heroine must distinguish between a call aligned with their purpose and a demand reflecting someone else’s expectation of their availability.

That doesn’t mean we stop caring about others. It means recognizing that our lives belong to us, and we have the right to decide how we will use them.

For women rewarded for compliance, that can be a radical realization. We don’t have to wait for permission to pursue our own missions or spend our lives negotiating with people who benefit from our willingness to put ourselves last.

When we tell children to be good girls or boys, what are we usually asking? We’re asking them to behave, follow instructions, and do what they’re told. In other words, we’re asking for obedience.

But being obedient is not the same as being a good person. A person can be obedient without possessing integrity, compassion, or a sense of justice. Conversely, someone can challenge authority, refuse to comply, and make other people uncomfortable while acting with tremendous integrity.

Both boys and girls hear messages about obedience, but girls often face additional expectations about being sweet, pleasant, and accommodating. Those qualities become intertwined with our understanding of what it means to be a good woman.

And if sweetness is genuinely part of our nature, as I believe it is part of mine, we don’t have to give that up either. But we can also be assertive. We can be ambitious. We can speak up when something is wrong. We can say no. We can get angry when anger is warranted. And we can pursue our own dreams without apologizing for making them a priority.

Because ultimately, being a good person isn’t about obedience. It’s about integrity, compassion, and respect, including respect for ourselves.

You can be a good person without being a good girl or a good boy.

And perhaps it’s time we stopped trying so hard to be good girls and started giving ourselves permission to become the heroines of our own stories.

Over the past several months, I’ve noticed a recurring theme in my success coaching practice.

As many of you know, much of my work as a psychologist and success coach centers on helping women clarify their vision, navigate major life transitions, and create lives and work that are deeply aligned with their values and purpose.

Over the past several months, a recurring theme has emerged in many of my success coaching conversations. More and more women have stepped into entrepreneurship. Some have pursued businesses they’ve dreamed about for years. Others have found themselves reimagining their careers after organizational restructuring, layoffs, or discovering that the traditional path no longer offered the opportunities or fulfillment they were seeking.

Although their stories are different, many eventually arrive at the same place: navigating the psychological challenges of building something entirely their own.

The numbers suggest this isn’t an isolated experience.

The Numbers Tell an Interesting Story

• Women now own more than 40% of all businesses in the United States.
• Approximately 14.5 million women-owned businesses generate $3.3 trillion in annual revenue and employ nearly 12.9 million people.
• Between 2022 and 2025, the number of women-owned businesses grew by 12%—nearly twice the growth rate of businesses owned by men.
• Women entrepreneurs were responsible for nearly 49% of all new businesses created between 2019 and 2024, representing a 69% increase in new business creation.
• Growth has been especially strong among women of color, with Black women-owned businesses experiencing particularly significant gains in recent years.

At the same time, workforce changes, including reductions across portions of the federal workforce and a more competitive job market, have prompted many professionals to rethink not only where they work, but how they work. Because Black women have historically been well represented in public-sector employment, many have been disproportionately affected by these shifts, leading some to explore entrepreneurship as one path forward.

As I listen to the women I coach, I find myself thinking less about business plans and marketing strategies and more about mythology. Over the years, I’ve found that one of the most powerful ways to help people make sense of major life transitions is through the lens of the Heroine’s Quest.

In both my therapy and success coaching practices, I often use the Heroine’s Quest as a framework to help clients understand personal and professional transformation. It reminds us that growth rarely comes from following an established path. It comes from leaving the familiar, navigating uncertainty, and returning transformed.

The entrepreneurial journey has much in common with the Heroine’s Quest. Both begin by leaving the familiar behind. Both require us to forge a path where no roadmap exists. Both are filled with unexpected twists, setbacks, discoveries, and moments of profound growth. And in both journeys, success depends less on avoiding uncertainty than on learning to navigate it.

The Ordinary World

Every Heroine’s Quest begins in the Ordinary World. For entrepreneurs, that world often consisted of a job: established organizations with job descriptions, a defined career ladder, performance evaluations, promotions, paychecks. In other words, someone else had already built the framework. Even if that world wasn’t perfect, its rules were familiar.

Then something changes.

The Call to Adventure

For some women the call has always been there, a desire to create something of their own, to build a business aligned with their values, passions, and vision. For others it arrived unexpectedly through layoffs, restructuring, or changing opportunities. The realization that the path they expected to continue on no longer feels available, or no longer feels right.

The call doesn’t promise that the journey will be easy.

It simply asks whether we’re willing to answer it.

Crossing the Threshold

The moment you commit to building something of your own, you cross a threshold.

For some women, that threshold feels exhilarating.

Freedom.

Creativity.

Autonomy.

Finally creating work that reflects who they truly are.

For others, particularly those who have spent years succeeding in structured organizations—the transition feels much less comfortable.

Without realizing it, they’ve also left behind familiar systems, established expectations, and someone else’s roadmap.

The threshold into entrepreneurship isn’t simply a business transition.

It’s a psychological one.

The Road of Trials (and Temptations)

This is where many entrepreneurs discover that building a business also means building themselves.

Every day presents new questions.

How should I price my services?

Am I marketing effectively?

Should I pivot?

Why isn’t this growing as quickly as I expected?

Am I spending my time on the right things?

For women who have always craved independence, these questions can feel like fascinating puzzles.

For others, they can feel overwhelming, frustrating, and deeply unsettling, creating a temptation to retreat to the safety of the Ordinary World.

The challenge isn’t simply uncertainty.

It’s learning to function well without certainty.

And then there are the emotional trials that few people talk about.

Loneliness.

Many women leave collaborative workplaces where colleagues were just down the hall, ideas could be tested together, and successes and setbacks were shared with a team. Entrepreneurship can be surprisingly isolating. The freedom to make every decision also means carrying every decision.

The loss of structure.

No one tells you what to prioritize today. No one establishes your deadlines. No one evaluates your progress. The very freedom that attracts many entrepreneurs also requires a level of self-direction that can take time to develop.

The loss of status.

This may be one of the least discussed transitions of all.

If you’ve spent years in a respected leadership role, people immediately understood what you did. Your title carried credibility. Your organization provided instant legitimacy.

Entrepreneurship often asks you to let go of that borrowed status while your own reputation is still being built.

Friends (and sometimes even family) may not fully understand what you’re creating. Some may quietly wonder when you’ll return to a “real job.” Others may not recognize the significance of what you’re building until long after you’ve begun.

Learning to derive confidence from your own vision rather than someone else’s title can become one of the greatest psychological transformations of the entrepreneurial journey.

Threshold Guardians

Every Heroine encounters Threshold Guardians.

Entrepreneurs do too.

Sometimes the guardian is self-doubt.

“Am I really qualified to do this?”

Sometimes it’s perfectionism.

Sometimes it’s comparison.

Sometimes it’s the expectation that success should happen much faster than it does.

Many women begin entrepreneurship after years of excelling in organizations where hard work produced relatively predictable rewards. Entrepreneurship rarely works that way. Progress is uneven. Growth isn’t linear. Setbacks are inevitable.

That mismatch between expectations and reality can become one of the journey’s greatest psychological obstacles.

Another common Guardian is visibility.

Many women have spent decades becoming exceptionally good at their work.

Running a successful business requires something different.

It requires allowing both yourself and your work to be seen.

Perhaps the greatest threshold guardian, however, is identity itself.

When someone asks, “So, what do you do?” it can feel much easier to answer with the name of a well-known organization than with the name of a business you’re still building.

During this stage of the journey, confidence can no longer rest primarily on a title, a recognizable employer, or external prestige.

It has to come from something much deeper:

A growing belief in yourself, your vision, and the value you are creating—even before the rest of the world fully sees it.

The Ordeal

Nearly every entrepreneur reaches a point where external validation disappears.

No supervisor is telling you you’re doing a good job.

No annual review confirms you’re on the right track.

No one can guarantee that your next decision is the correct one.

The deepest question becomes:

Can I trust myself enough to continue anyway?

For many entrepreneurs, this, not a financial setback, is the true Ordeal.

And on the other side of that ordeal lies something far more valuable than certainty:

Self-trust.

The Boon

When we think about entrepreneurial success, we often think first about revenue.

Revenue matters.

But many entrepreneurs discover that the greatest rewards run much deeper.

The confidence that comes from solving problems you once thought impossible.

The freedom to build work around your values rather than someone else’s expectations.

The excitement of creating something that never existed before.

The realization that you are capable of creating opportunities instead of waiting for them.

Sometimes the greatest gift isn’t the business you’ve built.

It’s the person you’ve become while building it.

Helpers Along the Way

Every Heroine’s Quest includes Helpers. In mythology they appear as Mentors, Guides, or Supernatural Aid. Entrepreneurship is no different. As a psychologist, success coach, and fellow entrepreneur, I’ve had the privilege of serving as a Helper for many women as they build businesses and lives that reflect their values, strengths, and vision. I can’t walk the journey for my clients. But I do help them navigate the uncertainty, challenge the beliefs that keep them stuck, reconnect with their vision, and continue moving toward the life and work they want to create.

Returning with the Elixir

In mythology, the heroine returns with The Elixir—the wisdom, transformation, or gift earned through her journey.

For entrepreneurs, that elixir may take many forms: a thriving business, financial freedom, meaningful work, creating jobs, solving important problems, mentoring others, or inspiring another woman to believe that forging her own path is possible.

Whatever form it takes, the elixir is never meant to be kept for ourselves alone. Its greatest purpose is what it allows us to contribute to others.

A Final Thought

Many entrepreneurs, myself included, possess the Huntress Spirit.

A huntress doesn’t wait for opportunity to wander into camp. She goes looking for it. She ventures into unfamiliar territory. She studies the landscape. She adapts when conditions change. She solves problems because her survival depends on it.

Entrepreneurship demands that same spirit. When your business is your livelihood, there is no one else responsible for finding the next opportunity, serving the next client, or creating the next solution. In a very real sense, entrepreneurs eat what they hunt.

That reality can feel intimidating. But it can also be exhilarating. For many entrepreneurs, there is a unique satisfaction in earning our livelihood through our own ingenuity, persistence, and willingness to venture into the unknown. Every conversation holds possibility. Every challenge becomes a puzzle to solve. Every setback teaches something. Every success is earned.

Whatever first brought you to this path, I hope you won’t become so focused on reaching the destination that you forget to appreciate the adventure itself. The Heroine’s Quest was never meant to be comfortable. It was meant to transform us. If we’re willing to embrace both the trials and the triumphs, we may discover that the greatest reward isn’t simply the business we’ve built—it’s the life we’ve created and the person we’ve become along the way.

Whether your next chapter involves entrepreneurship, a career transition, or another important life change, every meaningful journey begins with a vision. If you’re ready to take the next step on your own Heroine’s Quest and would value a thoughtful guide along the way, I’d be honored to walk beside you as you bring your vision to life.

Much continued success and well-being,

Nicole

dr.cutts@cuttsconsulting.com

What if the challenges, transitions, and uncertainties in your life are not random setbacks — but part of a deeper journey of transformation?

Dr. Nicole Cutts and author Shawn Pearson-Dingle explore the concept of seeing your life as a Heroine’s Quest — a powerful framework for understanding growth, resilience, purpose, and personal transformation.

Rather than viewing adversity as meaningless suffering, the Heroine’s Quest invites us to see life’s challenges as part of a larger journey toward insight, courage, and becoming.

This is a multi-part video series exploring the stages of the Heroine’s Quest and their connection to emotional well-being, meaning-making, and personal growth.

Follow along for new videos each week as Dr. Nicole Cutts and Shawn Pearson-Dingle discuss stages of the journey including:
• The Ordinary World
• The Call to Adventure
• Refusal of the Call
• Crossing the Threshold
• The Road of Trials
• The Ordeal
• The Ultimate Boon
• Return with the Elixir

Through personal stories, reflection, and discussion, this series explores how the Heroine’s Quest can help us better understand the challenges, transitions, and possibilities within our own lives.

Arm yourself with these tools on your quest!

Read the article: “Ten Steps to Achieving Your Vision of Success”  (You must subscribe to our newsletter to receive.)

Download the Four Basics Creative Visualization 2015

Download the Ideal Scenario Exercise 2015 exercise

Download the Success in Action Goal Plan 2015 worksheet.

Download the Four Agreements Coaching Lesson 2015 lesson.

Check out Women and Stress from the Cleveland Clinic

Subscribe to our YouTube Channel TheSuccessDoc for more FREE Tools and Travel Adventure videos

You might also want to check out my FREE ONLINE Course “Write Your Own Heroine’s Quest”

Much Continued Success and Well Being!

xxoo Nicole

Nicole Cutts, Ph.D. Founder Vision Quest Retreats, CEO Cutts Consulting, LLC. Author: The Adventures of  Isabelle Books I & II!

Long before access was expanded or equity was legislated, Black women were building businesses, acquiring property, structuring distribution networks, and creating financial institutions in the United States. In the face of legal exclusion and systemic barriers, they developed enterprises that did more than generate income — they built infrastructure. From banking and manufacturing to real estate, hospitality, and investment, these women created economic pathways that sustained families and strengthened entire communities. In addition to Maggie Lena Walker, Annie Turnbo Malone, Clara Brown, and Mary Ellen Pleasant, figures such as Sarah Breedlove (Madam C.J. Walker), Sara Spencer Washington, and later pioneers like Alonzo Herndon’s daughter Adrienne Herndon in the insurance sector contributed to this tradition of ownership and institution-building. Black women business owners have consistently leveraged entrepreneurship not merely for personal advancement, but to construct systems of collective economic resilience.

Below is a small sampling of four women who exemplify that legacy of ownership, strategy, and structural impact.

Maggie Lena Walker

Banking | 1903

Chartered and led the St. Luke Penny Savings Bank in 1903, becoming the first woman in the United States to found and serve as president of a bank.

She built financial infrastructure for Black communities during segregation, creating systems of economic stability and collective advancement.

Annie Turnbo Malone

Beauty Manufacturing | 1902

Founded the Poro Company in 1902 and built a multimillion-dollar haircare enterprise serving Black women nationwide.

She trained tens of thousands of women as sales agents and entrepreneurs, developing one of the earliest large-scale distribution networks in the country.

Clara Brown

Real Estate & Investment | 1860

After gaining her freedom, she moved to Colorado around 1860 during the Gold Rush and began investing in land, laundry businesses, and mining claims.

She became one of the first Black female property investors in the American West, building wealth through ownership and reinvesting in community

Mary Ellen Pleasant

Hospitality & Finance | 1852

Arrived in San Francisco in 1852 and built wealth through boarding houses, catering, and strategic investments during the Gold Rush era.

She used her capital to fund abolitionist causes and civil rights litigation, quietly financing structural change while operating as a sophisticated investor.

These women did not wait for permission to participate in the economy; they shaped it. Their enterprises remind us that access often follows infrastructure — and that ownership remains one of the most powerful tools for building lasting change.

Success without contribution is incomplete. At Vision Quest Retreats I work with women who are ready to define their life’s work in a way that builds impact — not just achievement.

This year, I marked my birthday with a journey of remembrance and reconnection—a pilgrimage to Ghana to walk in the footsteps of my ancestors and honor the strength they carried across oceans and generations. From the haunting stillness of the slave dungeons at Cape Coast and Elmina to the sacred waters of Assin Manso where the “Last Bath” was taken, this was a soul-stirring return to the source. But it was also a celebration of freedom and resilience—standing in Accra’s Black Star Square, visiting the Kwame Nkrumah Memorial, and bearing witness to Ghana’s bold emergence as the first independent nation in sub-Saharan Africa. This blog reflects on that sacred and layered journey—part history, part healing, all a big beautiful adventure!

In art such as literature and film, the Threshold Guardian is a common archetype or trope in a classic and prevalent narrative: the hero’s journey. This can be found anywhere from Homer’s Odyssey to The Wizard of Oz to Black Panther.

In real life we can embark on our own heroine’s quest to obtain what I call your Vision of Success.

Next time you are feeling afraid to continue or even embark on your heroine’s quest consider this! The heroine encounters a “threshold guardian” at the entrance to the zone of magnified power. This guardian stands in the way of the heroine moving on to the next level!

In literature, the Threshold Guardian’s job is to ensure the protagonist is worthy of passing the threshold, and thus they act as part of the tests the protagonist must face in the journey. A heroine who depends on her strength might attempt to overcome Threshold Guardians, while a heroine who depends on her wits might evade, bribe, learn from and even convert the Guardians to her cause. Needless to say, running away from a Threshold Guardian is not a successful way of dealing with one.

https://medium.com/@Ash_Capes/the-threshold-guardian-from-the-hero-s-journey-2c11184044d0